financial zen

No doubt you’ve read about the woman with the octuplets. The woman, who isn’t married, has no job, and so our dollars pay for “her” childrens upbringing, housing, etc. etc.
In one aspect, it’s wonderful she wants to be a mother. It’s another that she is financially inept to do so, let alone bypass adopting – which, by the way, you can be paid to adopt (still with tax dollars, but this is a digression – children are here who need love, who need a mother period). This isn’t a “pro-life/choice” debate – this is a woman who does things the wrong way and is rewarded for it. Book deals, paid appearances, and tax dollar funding.

How I screwed up

So many places to begin! I’ll go chronologically.

I waited until I was financially secure to get married.

That’s right – I had a paying job that could afford a mortgage payment if necessary. But I was salary, I was in love, and it made sense.
But getting married, I set myself up for a number of other colossal mistakes. I mean, by getting married when I was financially stable, I was able to afford rent and groceries! It’s crazy that I could’ve stayed with a student job, gotten married, and just lived on welfare, in government subsidized housing, and gotten food stamps instead!

I had kids with my wife

How idiotic we are – we waited until we had jobs and were married! If we were unemployed, or even better – not married – tax dollars could’ve covered everything, including W.I.C. so we’d get free food and other baby items! Instead, we paid for our baby like a couple of fools and the hospital took our money!

We bought a house we could afford

I overpay my mortgage, too. To think – I could be paying half as much in a house that cost twice as much and then have the Government stop the bank from foreclosing! We could be buying up properties left and right and making a mint by having the foreclosures stopped! Instead, we saved money, we paid money, and we continue to pay our mortgage without Government (or anyone else’s for that matter) assistance!

We have one child, and are considering another

We could be going for double digits, people! Seriously, my wife could just keep having more babies than we could afford – but hey, book deals come to irresponsible parents! Free stuff, too! And if we hit that magical mark, tax dollars could start paying for other aspects of our lives. Instead, we’re being responsible, and – while not just saying “oh, it’s not fiscally responsible to raise a child in today’s economy” – we’re saying “can we make this happen and be loving parents to two children or more?” Jobless or employed – you can be loving and responsible. Naturally – for us at least, but there are limits that one should place to prevent multiple births.

This is partially – partially – tongue in cheek. But the more I read (I know, mass media) of people crying about their hand outs and their continual rewards for the irresponsibility – the more aggravated I become over my constant striving for responsibility as a parent, an employee, and a citizen. Wall Street suddenly turned it’s back on the bailout money so it wouldn’t have to cap salaries – so I guess things weren’t that bad then?

They’re starting to realize that if the American economy collapses and the world economy follows, it doesn’t matter where they shuffle their money to – if money is devalued everywhere, it could leave them broke with nothing to show for it except the paper trail.

I hope people continue to be responsible – as I strive to be – in light of this horrible corruption, rip-offs and buy-offs. Buddha knows it’s difficult.

“Yesterday is history, tomorrow a mystery. But today is a gift – that is why it is called ‘present.’”

Mrs. Zen and I have long been battling the decision of a dual income, or having her be a stay at home mom. As much as I’d love to be a stay at home dad, I’m the main bread winner – her income is basically pure profit, free to spend as we desire (and mind you, it’s going towards debt reduction). We recently traded in my 1996 Honda Civic for a 2005 Honda CRV – mainly because we had the extra income to do a large down payment, and trips to Grandma and Grandpa’s with packed bags, stroller, and dog in tow. Once in the Civic was enough – and with a dual income we could more than afford a new(er) car.

As was pointed out – the after tax and childcare income is about 13k. But let’s make some adjustments:

Our childcare is about $2,340 due to our baby-sitter service. We only use them for one day a week – for now. If Mrs. Zen becomes full-time salaried, that will change, but no matter how you look at it – her additional income is after all bills are paid.

Let’s tackle their considerations:

• Career Advancement Goals – There is *always* more to a career than money! What about happiness? Mrs. Zen desires a career in paramedicine – she enjoys staying at home, but she also loves her work (as do I!)
• How to Return To Work? – I can’t really argue this one – leaving for eyars ad coming back in – that’s potentially ‘resetting’ your career unless you continue your work part-time.
• Extra Expenses – I’ve got to agree – working has expenses, just as staying at home. If no one is home, the heater/AC is off, less electricity, and at work you may have “job functions’ – happy hours, lunches and the like (I *DO* consider these essential – I owe my current job due to lunch-time networking! And pizza.)
• Breadwinner May Become Workaholic Career Freak – C’mon, really? This is a personal thing, and if you can’t balance your career and life, you need to reassess your values.
• Coupon Clipping – I’ve got mixed feelings here. My brother-in-law works from home (ebay business) and is an excellent father and cooks, while also shopping at night. He’s thrifty and is business than some other people I know. Coupon clip, regardless, I say.
• Schools – This is something I’m still looking into. I moved into a certain area for its reknowned public schools – you can send your kids to a private school so that by the age of six they know three languages and a head start on other students. Do you really want to make your kid go through that? You’ve got to focus on your kids being kids and not being “intellectual geniuses” or “young athletes” – they’re not here to live out your dreams. Do what you can to provide, but don’t force your kids to be something other than children.

Now the stay-at-home parent conundrum is an interesting one – I’ve talked to work-at-home, stay-at-home and day-care parents, with plenty of pros and cons. Your children need you to be their parent, but htey also need to develop social skills and learn to go out on their own – not developing an attachment on you, needing you for everything. I’m a parent, and the wife and I are working on him not developing separation anxiety, but I’m still reading on the psychology of it all (which is a never ending quest!)

Remember what I said last time?
Some people smarter and more qualified than I – agree:

There has been a lot of hand-wringing about whether or not the U.S. economy is currently in a recession. This morning’s data will, I think, lead to a near-unanimous view that the U.S. economy is in a recession. Not only was employment growth in February negative, but the B.L.S. also tells us that the previous two months were worse than originally thought. Over the past three months, non-farm payrolls fell at an annualized rate of about 0.1 percent.

This is a natural flow of rhythm in the world market, however. I’m thankful I’ve got a good job at a good company. Bush is trying to stave it off. He’s all ready cut taxes, and then came up with this – so he’s appealed to “Big Business” and also “to the common man” – essentially Keynesian economics and not in the same year, of course, being his last year in office he knows he should do everything he can instead of leaving the office in a wreck. Who knows what the next candidate will do?

This Christmas, take a moment to guess a gift – and it’ll give a gift to a child! />

Please, if you like the idea, please digg it – we’re going to give away a lot of gifts with this one! This is something that will lead to a lot of holiday cheer for some lucky kids!